5 spinsters here with me today, reveal why as a spinster you should move out of your parent’s house before marriage, is a post you must see.
It’s true that growth is an eventual process, and as kids, we adored being adults. But adulthood isn’t really all sweet and rosy.
As a guy or bachelor (😅😅), I always wanted to move out of my parent’s house.
I looked forward to it, I felt it was the perfect and final redemption when I was going to break free.
When I eventually did, after a night in the new place, I ran back home. As a matter of fact, the first weekend, I ran back to them.
But I remember a few comments made when I was about to move out.
My mom would always say, “you want where you will be bringing your girlfriends abhii?”
At some point she had the talk with my aunt, who responded, “and so if he brings his girlfriend or girlfriends, isn’t it a good thing?”
A male neighbour, on hearing I was about leaving, two nights before I left.
We sat under the moon and he counselled, one of the things he stressed on, was me maintaining the same lifestyle as I did when living with my parents.
Now enough of me, onto the topic of the day.
Meanwhile, let’s hear from these 4 spinsters who share their thoughts on this.
After NYSC I’m not going back home ~ Chidera
After my NYSC I ain’t going back home.
Because when you’re home you’ll feel relaxed and probably won’t explore the world the way you should.
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Another spinster, Paula Asinobi goes on about it.
She’ll understand finances better ~ Paula Asinobi
I love the idea. It gives space for the lady to understand herself more.
Essentially, it is a self-discovery journey. She’ll understand finances better because she’ll have more bills to pay.
She’ll understand security more. There are a lot of things to learn from it honestly. Privacy helps a lot.
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Another spinster, Kim, goes on further to say this…
You’d be wayward, Boys will be coming to disturb you ~ Kim
About this, It’s crossed my mind a couple of times. But my parents would not let you oo.
I told my mum once and she freaked out.
For me sha, I think it’s important to understand yourself and make decisions for you, before going to live with a man
What’s their reason?
You’d be wayward. Boys will be coming to disturb you.
If you can’t afford it, then comfortably stay in your parents house. ~ Chidinma
If you can afford it, why not? I don’t think any adult would like to stay in his/her parents’ house, because of the restrictions that come with it.
If you can’t afford it, then comfortably stay in your parents house.
There’s no where it’s written that women who lived independently before marriage were better wives or mothers than those who didn’t. Same goes for the men.
Wonderful ba? Same goes for the men. Check this last one from Patricia Ezeonyilimba, where she expressively talks about it.
Continually living with her parents honestly prevents the needed transition to adulthood ~ Patricia Eze
In all sincerity, I believe it is beautiful and should be encouraged.
I will share an experience that cemented this opinion even more, asides the obvious benefits and points that make it a great idea which I will share later on.
My Boss’s ( Principal’s) younger sister got married in November 2021. The Monday after the wedding, I went with my Boss to drop off the excess cake at the newly wedded’s house which she lived in as a Spinster and my mind was blown away!
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Her apartment was a small but really fancy and comfy one bedroom flat. You could clearly tell that she had the apartment furnished to her taste and that it was a place that she could while unmarried, call Home!
I loved this and ached for it and indeed moved to envision it.
But could it have been you, would your parents allow it?
I’m not the best person to ask this question because I can not relate to the parents restriction thing honestly.
After attending a Senior Secondary boarding School, I left Port-Harcourt for the University of Benin and have practically been independent and stayed on my own.
I have spent some Christmas away from home. You should know what this means. My Law School was at Lagos, I’m currently serving in Lafia and making plans to move to and work in Abuja.
From my secondary school days, I have always told my parents that I would not be based in Port-Harcourt and I believe this has been imprinted in their subconscious. I have prepared them for years for this.
Now they simply ask for when I’ll come visit. I believe you have your answer.
So yes, I love and encourage this. Everything has its vice, but an adult, goal-driven and God directed lady will hardly experience any.
Living alone makes a lady independent. It teaches her to know how to be her own and perfect all she knows. It prepares her for living with another spouse too.
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Continually living with her parents honestly prevents the needed transition to adulthood
As a bonus: I hate how this conversation is never had about Men. It has a lot of underlying messages don’t you think?
What about you? What’s your take on this. Send your response too!