So today on the blog. A counsel about love and relationships; not from me though. I had sent one just minutes earlier to someone. This is from one of the contributors and its awesome. I am not giving expo of any sort. Brace up as Comfort Eke takes you on this awesome ride!

Have you ever wondered why you were not created to just be alone? Why do you have feelings? They say feelings makes us human, but I don’t want to feel anything. Feelings makes things complex. How can someone just feel loved some days ago and then later you feel so angry? You feel so good at first but then you get so frustrated. Feelings only make life more complicated. I think we should just live life to fulfill purpose without needing anybody.

       Michelle felt so frustrated after a breakup with Bob. It started so good and he looked like what she wanted in a man. Michelle, a student of medicine in the University of Ibadan; with dreams to become a successful neurosurgeon. She was so ambitious but she also wanted a man that will support and stand by her side while she fulfils her dream. Just as it states “Nothing good comes easily”.

       She dated about four guys. Just before she broke up with the third guy; she started getting close to Bob who was an old friend from secondary school. Bob was always there to advise her when she needed it. He was there to console her when she was weak and depressed. He gave her the support she needed, supported her dreams, her career, everything of her. He gave her the attention she wanted from a man; so she broke up with the third guy, to finally settle with Bob. She visited Bob and spent time with him when she had little breaks at school. Bob called her daily and she got so used to the affection and care. They made lots of memories together and she loved him truly.

Eventually, Bob’s father fell sick. He went to his family house to help out and took over his family business. Michelle was so worried about Bob, so she called him daily to encourage him and prayed for his father to get well. Bob got so busy that he couldn’t call her that much and it became a habit. Michelle tried to talk to him about finding a balance between the work and the relationship. He always had excuse to give for the lack of attention. Michelle got so angry over the reduced attention, that she expressed her anger to Bob after several weeks of tolerance and understanding. She had an argument with Bob over it and it got worse, Bob didn’t call at all for two weeks. He even blocked her number, so she wouldn’t reach him. She was sad, worried and felt alone.

           However, she had to learn to move on. She felt bad, frustrated and cried for nights; she really wanted this one to work. Her friends asked about Bob but she covered up severally. She didn’t know how to tell her friends that she couldn’t contact her boyfriend of two months. Bob finally called after two weeks and said he couldn’t continue the relationship. He said he couldn’t combine the relationship and family and that was how the relationship ended. She felt so discouraged about relationship. Nights became wet for her as she constantly cried till she couldn’t cry anymore. Her friends had fed up on her and her failed relationships.

Michelle took a long walk to an empty park and thought about her life, she thought about what she had gone through in relationships; she then decided that she needed a break. The end of the year was approaching, so she couldn’t remain sad; she made new plans for her life. She decided to love her self more. She discovered she was so bothered about being in a relationship that she fell so fast and forgot about her needs.

          Alot of us are like Michelle. We are so bothered about having a boyfriend. Our friends talk about their relationship so much that we want to have one. Everyone needs love and we want to be loved as well. People get depressed about it. Most people are still in abusive relationships because they don’t want to be alone. The best thing is to figure yourself out, know what you really want and wait for it. Meet new people, socialize and have fun. It’s better to alone and be happy than to be in relationship that hurts you. Love yourself and the person that is meant for you will love you just the way you are.


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  1. A nice piece I must say, but just to add a little, relationship might truly not be for everybody but I still think it is, when the time is absolutely right, been depressed or obsessed with having someone in your life isn’t so healthy.

    How about cases of happy relationships with perfect ending? Relationships isn’t a bed of roses either, so expect hurts sometimes. If love works for you, then it’s cool, but if it doesn’t at that point in time, it’s still very much cool.

    Just keep building and improving yourself, till you find yourself a good match.

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